I just read with grave annoyance, the caption "US, UK mediate in Obasanjo, Atiku feud". What the &&^%*?! Why on Earth would those ones mediate in anything?! What makes it their business?

Seriously though, why wouldnt it be their business? The vice president , ex-president, INEC dude, EFCC guy and all the other "well meaning" politicians deem it fit to justify themselves before the "international community" (mainly the US and UK) rather than the Nigerian people, whom they (supposedly) serve. If these charlatans could see beyond their noses, they would discover that they have perfected the art of shamelessness, hence washing, not just their dirty linen, but their dirty, torn, overused teru in public.

Mr. Obasanjo reminds me so much about a story I heard in primary school , whose import did not really sink in until after my first year in university. It is titled "the emperor's new clothes". A simple story, really, about an emperor, so conceited, foolhardy and stubborn that he believed he could do no wrong. A fraudster played a fast one on him by selling him a set of clothes that were so pure that they could only be viewed by "holy" people. Thus, whoever couldnt see the clothes, was in effect, "unholy".

Anyway, the dictator, surrounded by sychophants, carefully put on the "clothes" (lest it tore) and rode round his kigdom, declaring himself the purest of the lot. Now, everybody had been forewarned, so they all kept "oooh-ing and aaa-ing" and commending the emperor's new clothes. Until one little boy screamed "But the emperor is naked"! That was when it suddenly dawned on him how much of a fool, he -the emperor- had been. For a little boy is considered pure and innocent.

After that story, I believe we can put 2 and 2 together and we will know who represents what character in present day Nigeria.

I mean, the list is endless.... So many things .... So many frustrations.... So many questions.... I mean, why would Charles Soludo use the Vice preseident's presidential jet, while Atiku boards a chartered flight?
Why would the ex-president utter statements like "no P-frigging-DP, no Nigeria"? And ah, the famous "The 2007 (s)elections are do or die for myself and the PDP"?
Why does this administration belive that what they have not achieved in 8 solid years, they can achieve in 2020, like the ex-president keeps saying?
What the heck is our business with the 2014 commonwealth games hosting, on which we will doubtless spend billions of naira that we cannot afford,? Even if we want to host, why construct an entire, new games village, when the COJA ones lie fallow?
Why on earth did we take the present $25m world bank load? I mean loan?
Why the heck would the rather-un good looking- british high commissioner to Nigeria state expressly at a forum that everything happening in nigeria is as a result of bad governance? What makes it his business? (The guy actually got a standing ovation for it!) Try that in Venezuela, and you become a persona-non-grata, before you are done with your sentence. If in doubt, go ask William Brownfield.
Why would the US issue a warning on fresh Niger-Delta attacks? Duh???? SOmething more intelligent, if you please!
Why did the technical committee from "advanced democracies" come to Nigeria to partner with INEC on the 2007 (s)elections? I dont see Mr. Iwu on any of those so-called gaffs.... not even to Benin republic.
Why, oh why..... this one, I can never ever know the reason, but how on earth did Ahmadu Ali get a national honor???!!! That one in particular infuriates me! I mean, then my pet snake should get one too!
What has been done about Okija? Why did the "cameras in the chambers" issue, as stated by the senate die down?
Why is Yomi no longer a page 3 contributor to saturday punch?!
What are the African leaders going to do about the US' decision to set up a PENTAgon base in Africa? Smile and feel priviledged, no doubt.
What is the deal with Ban Ki-Moon.... the guy is so eager to please its god-fathers! Anyway, it is rather unfortunate that Professor Gambari - with all due respect - formerly the under-secretary to the UN in the department of political affairs, lost to an american -Lynn Pascoe.... unfortunate, but expected. Dont ask me why!

Why on earth would I not vote for Jimi Agabaje????!!! Koro - bitter in yoruba (looks, talks and acts like a thug); Fashola - abeg, fashy the guy! Looks clueless!

Why, in the 27th century, do I have to inhale carbon monoxide everyday, as emmitted by my power generator? Why do I see people carrying jerry cans looking for water, fuel and kunu?! In the 27th century?!

This statement by Etubom Bassey Ekpo Bassey on the recent fuel scarcity puts it succintly... Said he " when the military made Obasanjo our president in 1999, nobody dreamt that petrol could sell for N30 per litre. Now petrol sells for N140 per litre. This is one of the reasons why Obasanjo’s economic reforms must be sustained by the administration so that Nigeria may effectively become the property of less than 100 people and the rest of us their loyal tenants whose support for the system shall be secured by a brutal police force".

No explanations demanded, and none presented, for the fuel scarcity.

It is well.

Well well.... so we eventually put our paint-brush where our mouth is, and created the BRT lanes.... Hmmmm...... nice, huh? Or plain annoying?!

Why on earth would a country that uses the left hand drive car system, allot bus lanes on the suppossedly fastest lanes?

Oh... I know.... I know..... me, aunty, me.... me...... me.....! Pls call me!!!
O..k, Anu, tell me... "Well, the thing is - the commissioner for transport and the LASTMA chief recently went to the UK for an "owanbe" and discovered some white lines on the roads,...... and when they asked what the lines were for, some bored motorist simply yawned "for the buses", and true to our "follow follow" nature, they came back and hey presto, the lines appeared and have definitely come to stay!

50,000 per offender.

Well, we the non-bus drivers/illegal BRT lane users had better be careful cos the bus stops just might be shifted to the left side of the highways now... so as soon as you hear "o wa o!", just get ready to slam your brakes! Now, it is either we expect more people to run accross the express lanes, or we expect the buses to make swift, hold-up-causing manuavers from the extreme left to the extreme right lanes.

Prior to now, the congestion on Lagos roads was simply horrendous! Sometimes, motorist form up to 7 lanes on a 3-lane road.... all in a bid to beat traffic. Now, we all have to contend with 1 1/2 lane(s) less. If the government would not provide better road networks, better road structures and alternative transport options, then the yellow line on the road thingy will be a gross inconvenience.

Either way, the 50,000/offender vultures win.

By the way, thank God LASTMA guys werent supplied with guns o.... they would have killed more motorists in 2 years than the police have done since the 1914 amalgamation.

Anyway, so no more "turboing" for me on the 3rd mainland bridge. Oh man, I'm so accustomed to making a single trip - ceteris paribus - in 4 minutes 15 seconds. :-( Now it'll be a lot slower.

Miss me.
/Nunu.

Skye bank.... skye bank... skye bank...... una dey sing o! I hope say the song dey bring in dividends sha, because he be like say instead make una train una staff for proper customer service, na accapella una dey do. Remember say Charles Soludo can ask for a bigger capital base again soon o..... This una sing sing,.... hope say he dey bring in money sha...

Ambi Pur encorages young women to only date older men with Ambi Pur in their cars.....

5555...... Thank goodness the entire album waxed to make us buy vicks lemon plus has been edited and we are saved from having to waste our time watching (well, pretty girls) performing a double clay (as opposed to a double platinum) single, just to get us to buy vicks.... which i stopped buying by the way.... I settled for baba blue... I'll tell you why.

I can so identify with the wierd looking guy in the blue outfit that the advert makes so much sense, and the ingrained humor is so typically Nigerian that it scores so much points with me....

Bank PHB has the best concepts I have come accross in a long long time... well, second only to Jimi Agbaje's "runnning for governor ads".... and it shows people are thinking.... For that and other reasons, I have decided UBA with their dead-man-talking-ads is out and bank PHB, here I come!

The CBN bit about the lady with the sick child who went to see a doctor and brought out money from her bra was really funny and nice and I have heard one or two people I know, who would ordinarily not give a hoot about where money comes from, correct others as per handling the naira with care.... So the ad worked.... well kind of :-)

The Dettol cool and Dettol Pure ads are equally nice.

Ah, Ariel gold too!

Viva Bournvita! My 19 months old cousin walks up to his mom and says he wants bournvita and she says "No". A simple " but every child deserves bournvita" made her scurry to the kitchen to prepare a full bottle of Bournvita for him! Now, that is a lovely adavert!

The list of the "good guys" is endless - the old MAMSER adverts... 7up's Fido Dido.... Nasco Adverts.... among others....

Ok, gotto get back to work... next will be my thoughts on the Obasanjo, Atiku, EFCC, INEC, Ala-Akala,National Awards, Baba Modinat, imbroglio..

Miss me.

/Nunu.

At last, my long-awaited write-up ! My friend, if you can drive in Lagos, especially on the mainland, then man mi, you can drive anywhere! New York ko, New Dawn ni! Well, I guess my topic kinda explains it all, No? Before I began driving, I knew getting behind the wheels in Lagos was quite stressful, even as a passenger I always could strongly sense an aggravated increase in the stress level of every and anybody driving a vehicle I was in. I have taken time to identify some of the things that personally piss me off, as a driver commuting in and around Lagos.

* The First Category will be what I call “The Sireners”

First and foremost will be the bullion vans from hell! I mean… come on! These guys are as reckless as they come, right? It is bad enough that these bats from Hades intimidate all and sundry off their paths, driving like maniacs simply because they have money to deliver (Well, not all the time as a story readily comes to mind of the sergeant in Ibadan who was sent to get some “Amala” for his boss. He got behind the wheels of a bullion van, turned on the siren, drove recklessly till he rammed into a brand new Mercedes Benz C-Class! For once “jungle justice” wasn’t delivered and the guy was escorted back to the police station by some “concerned Nigerians”. The DPO told the angry mob that he knew nothing about it as he had only sent the fingerling to get him Amala and he should face the consequences of his actions. It was at this point that the angry mob descended on the serg and beat him black and blue, right there in the police station! Wonders of Our World (WOW))! These crazed men oftentimes face oncoming traffic at break-neck speed on the expressway and woe betide whoever stands in their way!

Lest I forget, the number of folks with police escorts these days is quite alarming! I mean, is it =N=20/day or what, for every Shade, Obinna and Musa to afford the luxury of police escorts?! Once I read somewhere and find this really amusing that the British High Commissioner in Nigeria has guess what? – A nine car convoy! Talk about acting like the Romans in Rome! Mr. Blair sef, when he pass me for Jand, na two-car convoy! Shish!

Did I mention that Mr. Biggs food delivery vans also drive like they have a prerogative to deliver food to the Saints in Heaven as well, by the way they maneuver through traffic? Na wah o! The bastardization and abuse of the priviledge that is associated with siren usage has made true emergencies somewhat drab and redundant. Anyway, I no vex too much. I’ve been in a police-escorted vehicle on a number of occasions and even though I must honestly admit it was fun, I was appalled at the way innocent people were almost run down simply because I needed to catch a flight!

* The “Okadians”

LOL! I once saw an “okada” man competing with a petroleum tank driver, telling him to come closer and see if he (the okadian) will not “jam” the tanker! Can you beat that?! I laughed myself silly! These guys are skilled in the art of annoying you to the very bone and coupled with the Bullioners and Sireners, we still have to contend with the okadians. Never assume for once that an okada driver is reasonable, you just have to think for them, Exercise a lot of patience (which definitely isn’t one of my virtues) and make sure your right foot is on the brake, ready to drop, whenever you have an “okada” within a 360 degree radius of you! It is amazing the way the “Espiri de corps a la Okada” manifests whenever any of them is involved in an accident. It matters not who is guilty, as long as an okada is involved then the car/bus/truck driver must be guilty! They gather in seconds, deflate tyres and give the non-okadian a sound beating or do whatever they deem fit to the unlucky soul. It is so vexatious and makes me want to pull out my hair in strands!

Why on earth do they install the horns meant for choo-choo trains in some Okadas? And the sound systems in others? DJ Jimmy Jat go just jealous die! Like the O J Simpson saga, these are mysteries we will never understand.

It is worthy of note here that our “fine boys” on power bikes should be careful o. A word is enough for the wise! Showing off your circus abilities might earn you a date in Igbobi o! Standing on your seat, while driving at top speed is for the stunts guys in Universal Studios o! Hen hen, don’t say I didn’t warn you o.

* The almighty Tanker and Truck drivers

This lot… Whoa! For want of a better thing to say! They park indiscriminately on the bridges – structures meant for temporary transit – and contribute to the degradation of our bridges. Once I was stuck on the same spot in Apapa for well over 4 hours only to discover that all the traffic lanes had been taken over by tankers queuing to get into the jetty. They have sent so many people to an early grave especially those that run – smack - into them when they break down in the middle of the night. God helps whosoever has a car behind a trailer/tanker while ascending a slope and vice versa!

* The Foot Paths called Roads!

Well, the funny thing is that the roads weren’t actually this bad as at 1999 when the present government came into power. In fact these roads became decidedly worse with the Ogunlewe administration. No no no, we definitely don’t have “pot holes” on the roads. I mean, these holes are wider and deeper than the kirikiri cooking pots. No, in my opinion, we have “dungeon holes” on our roa… I beg your pardon, footpaths! Nigeria has been said to have the highest rate of ATDs (Avoidable Traumatic Deaths) in the world and our wonderful footpaths contribute greatly to this.

Aside from that, rounding a very sharp corner at top speed can prove very dangerous as some little lady just might be sweeping the innumerable sand on the roads that never seem to finish.
The road bumps….. Arrrrrggghhh! Police deterrents I call ‘em.

* Lunatics called learners

Whenever you see the “L” sign on any car, STEER CLEAR! If any accident happens, no matter how mild, you “the experienced one” will be the guilty one. Afterall, you saw the sign. I warn you, “L” indicates LUNATIC!

* Uncountable Traffic Officials

The fear of LASTMA, they say, is the beginning of (traffic) wisdom. Well, maybe true that. But when so many officials duplicate duties and for every 2 meters I move, I encounter the Federal Road Safety guys, VIO, FERMA, even KAI officials, harassing some motorist or the other, I cannot but wonder. Traffic Wardens haven’t been left out of the charade as well, as I have witnessed over and over these guys in orange, abi na yellow, deflate tyres for refusal to show drivers’ license on demand. WOW! (Wonders of Our World)
The illegal check points/road blocks mounted by mobile policemen nko?

* Hawkers, Area Boys, Pedestrians, Mad Men and Beggars

I have never seen so many people competing with cars in my life! I mean, roads are meant for cars, right?! But no be Lagos! Hawkers selling everything from Blood to Televisions sets and firewood, push their wares in your face without concern for their own safety and it is just disheartening. Although some of them turn out to be petty thieves in the evenings.

The “Area boys” – Wasted old men hiding….. Arrrrrggghhh Lemme just drop it.

Some of these so called “Mad men” aren’t really mad as there is this one around falomo round-about that sticks his head into people’s cars and threatens to throw-up in the car if he isn’t given money. Can you beat that?!

From cancer patients, to blind, pregnant, breast-feeding, crooning stars in the making, to the “fake oyinbos” from chad, to the ultimate mafia from up north, the beggar industry in Lagos is a multi-billion Naira one, if you ask me.

* Absence of Street lights

I wouldn’t dare to drive at night in Lagos! Simple reason being once the headlights from oncoming cars make contact with my eyes, I become as blind as a bat! The reverse however is the case whenever I am outside the country, simply because of the presence of operational street lights.

* Danfo / molue drivers, meat carriers, pepper seller carriers

Have you noticed that commercial bus/molue drivers simply make a left turn whenever they leave a bus-stop, even if there is no vehicle in front of them? My brother called my attention to this and it turned out to be true. They don’t mind the fact that you are coming towards them at 360 MPH. It’s your loss, not theirs. Also, remember that horns are meant for ….. well, everybody else but commercial bus drivers. They just simply are horn-deaf. Maybe not really sha. They ALWAYS hear the choo-choo cry of the okadians.

If you see the way meat is transported in Lagos, you’ll become a vegetarian. If you see the way peppers and vegetables are transported, then you’ll go on hunger strike. Anyway, that in itself is not the issue other than the fact that these mobile containers have “Crab Structures”. They move with their sides! You had better overtake only when you can clearly see the front and pay that no car is taking “one way”! Shish!

* Dirt

In heaps and mounds! We have ‘em in abundance! Calling on all recycling plants in the universe, Lagos Nigeria is a recycler’s haven! From “carry-go” to the cart pushers that dump refuse wherever they stop to pee, the abundance of crap is second to none.

* Others

CO2 emissions, Lack of adequate parking facilities, Perrenial floods, lack of safety, among others.

For sanity of mind, I will stop here. This has been a really long one and I am not one to complain if I don’t have something constructive to offer in return. In this particular instance however, I don’t have anything to offer. Ok, I lied, I do have a shit load of suggestions, but except OBJ reads my blog, I aint saying Nada!

All I wanted to say.
/Nunu.

Well, the thing is I absolutely love to write! I was already making "to - dos" right from my mother's womb and I must say it helped ease the suddeness of being squeezed through a somewhat tight opening - head first, being blinded by sudden light, covered in slime and staring at big furrowed brows with (I think they were) smiling faces.... all staring right back at me! If that wasnt disturbing enough, some old (I could have sworn she looked motherly and friendly at first) matronly lady truned me upside dwon and smacked me right on my behind! What nerve! Well, talk about a grand entrance!

After that, I made a mental to - do not to speak to anyone for nine solid months and I made good my promise. All I did was cry, suckle, sleep, cry, look cute, pooh, cry, pee and whatever it was that caught my fancy.... well, until I couldnt take it anymore! I had so many things I had observed and I had so many questions I needed to ask..... So, at the tender age of nine months, I started running round the house AND, well, you guessed right, TALKING!

Anyway, for as long as I can remember, I have loved to talk, read and write, so much so, it earned me the name "Ata wewe" (Hot pepper, methinks it means... well, me no sure) as a child. I remember at age 13 months.... I was already attending a "jeleosimi" (let the house rest) and one day, my grandma came to pick me up from "school". On our way home, I happened to see a man with one leg walking with crutches on the other side of the road and I just screamed with a loud voice "see grandma...one leg!" When I was (wrongfully) ignored, I gathered as much air as I could in my little lungs and screamed once again..... and I didnt stop till I got attention... a lot of it. My grandma was so darn embarassed, he he!. Anyway, typical Lagos scene, a small crowd gathered, all with diffrent opinions.... my grandma apologised profusely.... bla bla bla and we all lived happily ever.... well, for the rest of the walk home.

Why, pray tell, would you bore us with all of this hogbladash, you might ask? Well, the thing is, I met a supposedly wonderful fellow... you know, "my first love" and the first thing he did was to ensure I stopped writing. He told me that I wrote more than I talked to him. So, to please my "true love" I ditched one of my passions and after the dude and I parted ways, I prayed.... cried..... tried and did everything humanly possible to begin writing again... all to no avail. This was really stressful and frustrating for me, so much so that I became really introverted. I had so much to say, yet I had lost the ability to express myself. A bondage of sorts......

Now, to really cut the long story short.... I got me a laptop and slowly, steadily, I tried to pick up writing again and voila! Today, I might not write as much as I have done in the past, yet, but I hope via this medium, I can relive my..... you know.... huh.... em... stuff... huh... whatever.

Now, the moral of the story is this - Never let anyone, no matter what he,she or it is to you, make you choose between them and what you absolutely love to do.... well, except that which you love to do does not add to anyone else but you.

All I wanted to say.

Brizgalna brizga

Ej lubca moja nocoj pridem po te
te ukradem mami in odpeljem te
nekam na lepše, na sok al` sladoled
oh, kako bo lep ta svet

O ne ne ljubèek tako pa to ne gre
meni že drugi je prižgal srce
mi moj gasilec že na pomoè hiti
da požar v meni pogasi

Ti sploh ne veš kaj zamujaš ...
Zaman se trudiš, premalo mi ponujaš ...

REFREN
Izbrala si bom fanta "tizga ta velizga"
saj brizgalna ta njegova res najlepše brizga
izbrala si bom fanta "tizga ta velizga"
tudi meni je lepo, ko tako zavriska

Ej lubca moja ti vedno sama boš
saj noè in dan klièe ga dolžnost
grom in strela njegov sta drugi dom
tebe zanemarjal bo

O ne ne ljubèek to pa sploh ni res
vsako soboto odpelje me na ples
mašina rdeèa v soncu se blešèi
on za varnost poskrbi

Ti sploh ne veš kaj zamujaš
Zaman se trudiš, premalo mi ponujaš ...

P.S. It's Slovene..


TRANSLATION......

hey baby tonite i'll come for you
that i'll steal you from your mom and take you
somewhere beaut, on a drink or icecream
oh, how beaut this world'll be

oh no no baby, it doesn't go so
someone else lighted my heart
my fireman already rushes me to help
that he extingueshes the fire in me

you don't know what you're missing....
in vain you endeavour, you don't offer enough...

refrain
i'll choose a guy "da big one"
cos "his squirt" gushes the most beautifull
i'll choose a guy "da big one"
it's beaut to me when he yodels

ey my baby you'll always be lonely
cos night and day his duty calls
thunder and lightening are his second home
he'll neglect you

oh no no baby it isn't true
every saturday he takes me dancing
the red machine shines in the sun
he takes care about the safety

you don't know what you're missing...
in vain you endeavour, you don't offer enough

refrain

Hello Everyone,

Whatz up for the new year?.

I came across this article and i felt it is a must read for every one that doesn't plan to be a spectator in life!.

It is quite long, and for those of you who,like me,detests long write ups,pls try and finish it making evey word sink!.

It was delivered by Emeagwali, at a conference two months ago.

It goes thus.....

For 10 million African-born emigrants, the word "home" is synonymous with the United States, Britain or other country outside of Africa.

Personally, I have lived continuously in the United States for the past 30 years. My last visit to Africa was 17 years ago. On the day I left Nigeria, I felt sad because I was leaving my family behind. I believed I would return eight years later, probably marry an Igbo girl, and then spend the rest of my life in Nigeria. But 25 years ago, I fell in love with an American girl, married her three years later, and became eligible to sponsor a Green Card visa for my 35 closest relatives, including my parents and all my siblings, nieces and nephews.

The story of how I brought 35 people to the United States exemplifies how 10 million skilled people have emigrated out of Africa during the past 30 years. We came to the United States on student visas and then changed our status to become permanent residents and then naturalized citizens. Our new citizenship status helped us sponsor relatives, and also inspired our friends to immigrate here. Ten million Africans now constitute an invisible nation that resides outside Africa. Although invisible, it is a nation as populous as Angola, Malawi, Zambia or Zimbabwe. If it were to be a nation with distinct borders, it would have an income roughly equivalent to Africa's gross domestic product.

Although the African Union does not recognize the African Diaspora as a nation, the International Monetary Fund (IMF) acknowledges its economic importance. The IMF estimates the African Diaspora now constitutes the biggest group of foreign investors in Africa.

Take for example Western Union. It estimates that it is not atypical for an immigrant to wire $300 per month to relatives in Africa. If you assume that most Africans living outside Africa send money each month and you do the math, you will agree with the IMF that the African Diaspora is indeed the largest foreign investor in Africa. What few realize is that Africans who immigrate to the United States contribute 40 times more wealth to the American than to the African economy. According to the United Nations, an African professional working in the United States contributes about $150,000 per year to the U.S. economy.

Again, if you do the math, you will realize that the African professional remitting $300 per month to Africa is contributing 40 times more to the United States economy than to the African one. On a relative scale, that means for every $300 per month a professional African sends home, that person contributes $12,000 per month to the U.S. economy. Of course, the issue more important than facts and figures is eliminating poverty in Africa, not merely reducing it by sending money to relatives. Money alone cannot eliminate poverty in Africa, because even one million dollars is a number with no intrinsic value.

Real wealth cannot be measured by money, yet we often confuse money with wealth. Under the status quo, Africa would still remain poor even if we were to send all the money in the world there.

Ask someone who is ill what "wealth" means, and you will get a very different answer than from most other people. If you were HIV-positive, you would gladly exchange one million dollars to become HIV-negative. When you give your money to your doctor, that physician helps you convert your money into health - or rather, wealth. Money cannot teach your children. Teachers can. Money cannot bring electricity to your home. Engineers can. Money cannot cure sick people. Doctors can.

Because it is only a nation's human capital that can be converted into real wealth, that human capital is much more valuable than its financial capital. A few years ago, Zambia had 1,600 medical doctors. Today, Zambia has only 400 medical doctors. Kenya retains only 10% of the nurses and doctors trained there. A similar story is told from South Africa to Ghana.

I also speak from my family experiences. After contributing 25 years to Nigerian society as a nurse, my father retired on a $25-per-month pension. By comparison, my four sisters each earn $25 per hour as nurses in the United States. If my father had had the opportunity my sisters did, he certainly would have immigrated to the United States as a young nurse. The "brain drain" explains, in part, why affluent Africans fly to London for their medical treatments. Furthermore, because a significant percentage of African doctors and nurses practice in U.S. hospitals, we can reasonably conclude that African medical schools are de facto serving the American people, not Africa.

A recent World Bank survey shows that African universities are exporting a large percentage of their graduating manpower to the United States. In a given year, the World Bank estimates that 70,000 skilled Africans immigrate to Europe and the United States. While these 70,000 skilled Africans are fleeing the continent in search of employment and decent wages, 100,000 skilled expatriates who are paid wages higher than the prevailing rate in Europe are hired to replace them.

In Nigeria, the petroleum industry hires about 1,000 skilled expatriates, even though we can find similar skills within the African Diaspora. Instead of developing its own manpower resources, Nigeria prefers to contract out its oil exploration despite the staggeringly high price of having to concede 40% of its profits to foreign oil companies.

In a pre-independence day editorial, the Vanguard (Nigeria) queried: "Why would the optimism of 1960 give way to the despair of 2000?" My answer is this: Nigeria achieved political independence in 1960, but by the year 2000 had not yet achieved technological independence.

During colonial rule, Nigeria retained only 50% of the profits from oil derived from its own territory. Four decades after this colonial rule ended, the New York Times (December 22, 2002) wrote that "40 percent of the oil revenue goes to Chevron, [and] 60 percent to the [Nigerian] government." As a point of comparison, the United States would never permit a Nigerian oil company to retain 40% of the profits from a Texas oilfield.

Our African homelands have paid an extraordinary price for their lack of domestic technological knowledge. Because of that lack of knowledge, since it gained independence in 1960, Nigeria has relinquished 40% of its oilfields and $200 billion to American and European stockholders. Because of that lack of knowledge, Nigeria exports crude petroleum, only to import refined petroleum. Because of that lack of knowledge, Africa exports raw steel, only to import cars that are essentially steel products.

Knowledge is the engine that drives economic growth, and Africa cannot eliminate poverty without first increasing and nurturing its intellectual capital.

Reversing the "brain drain" will increase Africa's intellectual capital while also increasing its wealth in many, many different ways. Can the "brain drain" be reversed? My answer is: yes. But in order for it to happen, we must try something different.

At this point, I want to inject a new idea into this dialogue. For my idea to work, it requires that we tap the talents and skills of the African Diaspora. It requires that we create one million high-tech jobs in Africa. It requires that we move one million high-tech jobs from the United States to Africa.

I know you are wondering: How can we move one million jobs from the United States to Africa? It can be done. In fact, by the year 2015 the U.S. Department of Labor expects to lose an estimated 3.3 million call center jobs to developing nations.

In this area, what we as Africans need to do is develop a strategic plan - one that will persuade multinational companies that it will be more profitable to move their call centers to nations in Africa instead of India. These high-tech jobs include those in call centers, customer service and help desks - all of which are suitable for unemployed university graduates.

The reason these jobs could now emerge in Africa is that recent technological advances such as the Internet and mobile telephones now make it practical, cheaper and otherwise advantageous to move these services to developing nations, where lower wages prevail. If Africa succeeds in capturing one million of these high-tech jobs, they could provide more revenues than all the African oilfields. These "greener pastures" would lure back talent and, in turn, create a reverse "brain drain."

Again, we have a rare and unique window of opportunity to convert projected American job losses into Africa's job gain, and thus change the "brain drain" to "brain gain."

However, aggressive action must be taken before this window of opportunity closes. India is a formidable competitor. Therefore, we need to determine the cost savings realized by outsourcing call center jobs to Africa instead of India. That cost saving will be used as a selling point to corporations interested in outsourcing jobs.

A typical call center employee might be a housewife using a laptop computer and a cell phone to work from her home. As night settles and her children go to bed, she could place a phone call to Los Angeles, which is 10 hours behind her time zone. An American answers her call and she says, "Good morning, this is Zakiya." Using a standard, rehearsed script, she tries to sell an American product. Now that USA-to-Africa telephone calls are as low as 6 cents per minute, it is economically feasible for a telephone sales person to reside in Anglophone Africa while virtually employed in the United States, and - this is important - paying income taxes only to her country in Africa.

I will give one more example of how thousands of call center jobs can be created in Africa. It is well known that U.S. companies often give up on collecting outstanding account balances of less than $50 each. The reason is that it often costs $60 in American labor to recover that $50. By comparison, I believe it would cost only $10 in African labor (including the 6 cents per minute phone call) to collect an outstanding balance of $50.

Earlier, the organizers of this Pan African Conference gave me a note containing eleven questions.

The first was: Do skilled Africans have the moral obligation to remain and work in Africa? I believe those with skills should be encouraged and rewarded to stay, work, and raise their families in Africa. When that happens, a large middle class will be created, thereby reducing the conditions that give rise to civil war and corruption. Then, a true revitalization and renaissance will occur.

The second question was: Should skilled African emigrants be compelled to return to Africa? I believe controlling emigration will be very difficult. Instead, I recommend the United Nations impose a "brain gain tax" upon those nations benefiting from the "brain drain." Each year, the United States creates a brain drain by issuing 135,000 H1-B visas to "outstanding researchers" and persons with "extraordinary ability."

The U.S. Internal Revenue Service (IRS), working in tangent with the Immigration and Naturalization Service (INS), could be required to credit one month's salary, each year, to the country of birth of each immigrant. Already, the IRS allows U.S. taxpayers to make voluntary contributions to election funds. Similarly, it could allow immigrants to voluntarily pay taxes to their country of birth, instead of to the United States.

The third question was: Why don't we encourage unemployed Africans to seek employment abroad? Put differently, if all the nurses and doctors in Africa were to win the U.S. visa lottery, who will operate our hospitals? If we encourage 8 million talented Africans to emigrate, what will we encourage their remaining 800 million brothers and sisters to do?

The fourth question was: Should we blame the African Diaspora for Africa's problems? Yes, the Diaspora should be blamed in part, because the absence it's created has diminished the continent's intellectual capital and thus created the vacuum enabling dictators and corruption to flourish. The likes of Idi Amin, Jean-Bedel Bokassa and Mobutu Sese Seko would not be able to declare themselves president-for-life of nations who have a large, educated middle class.

The fifth question was: Should we not blame Africa's leaders for siphoning money from Africa's treasuries? It becomes a vicious circle: the flight of intellectual capital increases the flight of financial capital which in turn increases again the flight of intellectual capital.

Leadership is a collective process, and "brain drain" reduces the collective brainpower needed to fight corruption and mismanagement. For example, the leadership of the Central Bank of Nigeria did not call a news conference after Sani Abacha stole $3 billion dollars from it. The bank's Governor-General did not go on a hunger strike. He did not report the robbery to the police. He did not file a lawsuit. Had they the intellectual manpower to counter corruption, the results would have been very different.

The sixth question was: Is it possible to achieve an African renaissance? Because by definition, a renaissance is the revival and flowering of the arts, literature and sciences, it must be preceded by a growth in the continent's intellectual capital, or the collective knowledge of the people. The best African musicians live in France. The top African writers live in the United States or Britain. The soccer superstars live in Europe. It will be impossible to achieve a renaissance without the contributions of the talented.

The seventh question was: For how long has the "brain drain" problem existed? A common misconception is that the African "brain drain" started 40 years ago. In reality, it actually began ten times that long. Four hundred years ago, most people of African descent lived in Africa. Today, one in five of African descent live in the Americas. Therefore, measured in numbers, the largest "brain drain" resulted from the trans-Atlantic slave trade.

Contrary to what people believed, Africa experienced a brain gain during the first half of the 20th century. Schools, hospitals and banks were built by the British colonialists. These institutions were the visible manifestations of brain gain. At the end of colonial rule, skilled Europeans fled the continent. Skilled Africans started fleeing the continent in the 1970s, 80s, and 90s. The result was the widespread rise of despotic rulers.

The eighth question was: Is "brain drain" a form of modern slavery? By the end of the 21st century, people will have different sensibilities and will describe it as modern day slavery. In the 19th century, which was an Agricultural Age, the U.S. economy needed strong hands to pick cotton, and the young and sturdy were forced into slavery. In the 21st century, which is an Information Age, the U.S. economy needs persons with "extraordinary ability" and the best and brightest are lured with Green Card visas. Africans who are illiterate or HIV-positive are automatically denied American visas.

The ninth question was: Do you believe that the "brain drain" can be reversed? As I stated earlier, "brain drain" is a complex and multidimensional problem that can be reversed into "brain gain." India is now reversing its "brain drain," and turning it into "brain gain;" I believe Africa can do the same. But unless we reverse it, the dream of an African renaissance will remain an elusive one.

The tenth question was: Can we blame globalization as a cause of brain drain?

Globalization began 400 years ago with the trans-Atlantic slave trade that brought the ancestors of 200 million Africans now living in the Americas. It has accelerated because the Internet and cell phone now enable you to communicate instantaneously with any person on the globe.

Overall, globalization is a force that is denationalizing the wealth of developing nations. Economists have confirmed that the rich nations are getting richer while the poor ones are getting poorer. We also know that the globalization process is increasing the foreign debts of developing nations, accelerating the flight of financial and intellectual capital to western nations. The economics of offshoring will force multinational corporations to outsource to developing nations where lower wages prevail.

To remain competitive and profitable, companies will be forced to reduce costs by hiring five-dollars-an-hour computer programmers living in Third World countries and lay off expensive American programmers that demand $50 an hour. In the long term, offshoring will reverse the flight of financial and intellectual capital from western nations to the Third World.

The eleventh question was: Why have I lived in the United States for 30 continuous years? Africa has bitten at my soul since I left. My roots are still in Africa. My house is filled with Africana - food, paintings, music, and clothes - to remind me of Africa.

I long to visit the motherland, but I must confess that when Africa called me to return home, I couldn't answer that call. The reason is that I work on creating new knowledge that could be used to redesign supercomputers. The most powerful supercomputers cost $120 million each and Nigeria could not afford to buy one for me. I created the knowledge that the power of thousands of processors can be harnessed; this knowledge, in turn, inspired the reinvention of vector supercomputers into massively parallel supercomputers.

New knowledge must precede new technological products and the supercomputer of today will become the personal computer of tomorrow. And so to answer your question: even though I reside in the U.S. the knowledge that I created is now materializing into better personal computers purchased by Africans.

Finally, millions of high-tech jobs can be performed from Africa, but may instead be lost to India. We must identify the millions of jobs that will be more profitable when transferred from the United States to Africa.

Doing so will enable us to create a brain drain from the United States and convert it to a brain gain for Africa.

All the best in what ever dimension this article puts you. Remember that we are the ones that can give the best to ourselves